


Cause And Effect

by One_Small_Writer



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Eating Disorders, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mentors, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:02:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29061780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/One_Small_Writer/pseuds/One_Small_Writer
Summary: Santana and Marley have a heart to heart.(Or, what if The New Directions weren't disqualified? What if they got back on stage and Marley was left with Santana and Puck?)
Relationships: Jake Puckerman/Marley Rose, Santana Lopez & Marley Rose
Comments: 5
Kudos: 21





	Cause And Effect

**Author's Note:**

> *Trigger warning for eating disorder here*  
> So Marley has been my comfort character since I was ten years old because that's how long I've had my own eating disorder, and I've been writing my own fanfic based on the premise just for myself in notebooks since I was twelve (My friends used to read it during independent reading, don't know how well that turned out for me but oh well) so I knew eventually I'd post one, and when I rewatched this episode recently I found myself really cherishing Santana and Marley's interactions in this episode because it reminds me a lot of a certain friend I have who helps me through a lot when it comes to our costume days at theatre, so this one is for her!

“Santana, Puck, you stay here with Marley,” Mr Schue addressed the group, looking around at each of them wildly. Out of the corner of her eye, Marley saw Santana nod and smile at her encouragingly, though not before sending another glare Kitty’s way. “The rest of you guys, get back up there! Leaving the stage mid-competition for any reason is facing immediate disqualification!”

At that everyone jumped up, giving Marley sympathetic looks and mumbled ‘get better’s and ‘we'll be back in second’s and ‘hope you’re okay’s before running out the door, giving her another look before they left. Jake stayed sat by her side as everyone else left, his hand unmoving from her back. “Jake, come on, we’ve gotta go,” Finn urged, standing in the doorway. 

Jake shook his head. “I’m not leaving her like this,” He protested.

“Dude, they can’t compete without you out there too, there won’t be enough people,” Puck said, giving him a knowing look. 

“I don’t care, I’m not leaving her here.”

“She’ll be here with Santana and Puck, come on Jake we have to go!” Finn urged, bouncing on his feet.

“I’m not-”

“Jake,” He paused when he heard Marley’s weak voice from beside him, and he looked down at her with eyes full of worry. “I need you to go onstage.”

“But-"

“Jake, if we don’t win because of me I’ll never forgive myself. You need to go out there and prove to everyone how awesome you are. Glee club needs its leading man,” She urged gently, nudging him with her shoulder until he was forced to stand.

“Are you sure?” He asked, towering over her. Marley sunk back into her seat a bit, just on impulse, and nodded, grabbing his hand.

“Positive. I’ll be okay.”

Jake nodded and squeezed her hand. “Look after her,” He said to Puck and Santana, giving Marley one last look before running out the door. Finn gave Marley an appreciate look and mumbled his own ‘get better’ before going after Jake.

Marley let out a sigh and put her head in her hands as her entire body started to shake. She missed Jake beside her and wanted nothing more, other than to go home to bed maybe, for him to still be there beside her, but she knew he needed to go out there. It was true, she’d hate herself if they didn’t win because of her, and if that meant Jake leaving, then so be it.

The guilt was already eating her alive regardless.

Everything that had happened since Grease came flooding over her and she felt a bit like she was going to faint again, or at the very least throw-up. She took a shuddering breath, and that’s all it took for the tears to come flooding forward. She hated herself, she hated Kitty for doing this to her even if deep down she knew she was the only one to blame. She hated that she’d ruined their performance, she hated that she’d let everyone down. She hated that she’d let herself go this far and hated even more that she knew she couldn’t stop, couldn’t get better.

She hated everything.

Santana watched as Marley unravelled in front of them and sighed sadly. She’d been in Marley’s position herself a few short years ago, and she knew how the poor girl felt. Eating disorders were an endless weight on someone’s shoulders, they were burdening, and when sudden things like this happened, they were even more daunting than usual. She pitied her, she was in the eye of the storm and terrified about what was to come. Santana knew the feeling.

She just wished she’d done more to help when she’d worked it out. Then maybe they wouldn’t be in this situation.

“Hey Puckerman,” Santana whispered, catching his attention. Puck turned to look at her, eyebrow raised. “Can you give us a minute? I think we need to have a chat, girl to girl.”

Puck nodded. “I’ll go wait for her mom outside,” He said, walking out with a tight smile and closing the door behind him.

Marley heard the door click and looked up, locking eyes with Santana for a split second before looking back down at her shaking hands. Santana sighed again and took the seat beside her, grabbing the juice box off the floor. “Here, have this,” She said, holding it out to Marley.

“I don’t want it,” Marley sniffed, wiping tears from her face.

“I know you don’t want it, and you be thankful I’m not force-feeding you jellybeans like Brittany once did to me. But this isn’t a matter of wanting it or not anymore. You need it,” She coaxed, opening her hand herself and placing it there. “Drink it, and I’m not leaving room for argument, even if it did come from Blaine’s locker.”

Marley let out a nervous laugh and with hands now jumping around like there was an earthquake, stabbed the straw through the foil, more violently than needed. Her entire body shaking violently, almost tremor like, she tentatively held it to her lips and takes the first sip. It makes her want to throw up straight away and only makes her feel worse, but Santana is eyeing her and she really doesn’t want to let Santana down more than she has so she sucks it up and drinks it, slower than she’d drunk anything before.

Santana kept a firm eye on her as she drank, making sure she did so without tampering with it as she took off her jacket and wrapped it around the girl’s trembling shoulders. She sat back down beside her and took her hand in hers, and that’s all it took for Marley to dissolve into tears again, her breaths turning to heaving sobs within seconds. Santana, not wanting Marley to choke, took the juice away from her and sloshed it around to check it’s volume before putting it back on the floor, grabbing the edge of Marley’s chair to pull her closer and then into a tight hug. 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Marley cried, burying her head in Santana’s shoulder. “I’ve ruined everything, I’m so sorry.”

Santana squeezed her protectively, her heart aching for the tiny girl in her arms. She felt like someone who was sick. Her bones were sharp, her dress revealing her collarbones for Santana to see, and she was so thin. Just by hugging her, Santana could tell just how far in she was. “Don’t be sorry, none of this is your fault.”

“It is though! I’ve let everyone down, I’m so sorry!” She repeated.

Santana didn’t say anything after that, save for the occasional whispered reassurance. She knew whatever she said wasn’t going to get through to her, and she knew how much people telling you the opposite of what you thought could get irritating when you didn’t want to hear it, so she just held her until she calmed herself down and pulled away.

“You, you mentioned Brittany and jellybeans?” Marley mumbled, looking down at their still joint hands. 

Santana nodded, understanding what she was asking. “Let’s put it this way. When you mix being a cheerleader for your entire junior high and high school career, having a coach like Sue Sylvester and the added stress and burden of working out your sexuality and the crush you have on your best friend, it’s a recipe for disaster.”

“I’m so sorry,” Marley said quietly.

Santana squeezed her hand. “Don’t be, that’s in the past now. Because I got better. And I know you can too.”

Marley sucked in a sharp breath. “I just, I don’t think I can. I’m not strong enough.

Santana couldn’t help but scoff. “Bullshit, you are so strong enough to get better. Even if you yourself don’t see your strength, everyone else around you can. I certainly can. You are stronger than this and will get through the other end.”

“I feel the opposite. And after that stunt no one is going to think I’m strong, they’ll see me for what I am!”

Santana sighed and squeezed her hand again, knowing once more that she was never going to get through to her. “Okay, but just know that what your brain is trying to convince you right now isn’t the truth. You're a beautiful girl Marley, and don't you let anything convince you otherwise. I won’t say anything else about it, but just let it sink in.”

Marley nodded. “Okay,” She whispered.

They were silent for a few moments before Santana spoke up again. “You’re going to hate me for this, but I have to ask. How did this all start?”

Marley winced. “When we did Grease all my costumes just suddenly didn’t fit. One day it was fine and the next they were sizes too small. And I didn’t get why at first until Kitty brought up my… family history. I figured it was in my genetics, you know. And she’s right, it’s inevitable that I’m going to end up, I don’t know how to word this, big. And it scares me. So I asked her for advice and she told me about purging, and the rest I just figured out on my own. Once I started I couldn’t stop and it felt good, it still feels good,” She said, crying again.

She knew it. She fucking knew it. Santana was seething, almost shaking with rage. “Son of a bitch,” She swore under her breath.

“What?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” Santana shook her head, “I just had a hunch. I’ll tell you another time, I don’t want to make you feel any worse. Have some more juice.” She picked up the carton again and passed it back to her.

Marley took it without a protest, still feeling sick and scared but knowing deep down it would help in the long run.

“Look, Marley, I may have only known you for a week, but you’re my girl now. And one thing you should know about me, I’m fiercely protective of my girls,” Santana said as she watched Marley drink. “And I’ll be damned if I let this happen to you again. From here on in, I’m on your side. Whenever you feel like you start to spiral again, whenever who feel something like this happening again or whenever you need me, you call me. Or text me. It’s not much and it won’t fix everything, but it’s a start. I know talking to those psychologists about all this is daunting and it sucks because as much as they claim to know everything about this because they have a degree, unless they’ve experienced it they’re not gonna know how it feels. So I’ll be there, ready to talk no matter what time of day it is. Girl to girl, survivor to survivor.”

Marley gulped down the last of her drink and smiled again, tears to a different kind springing in her eyes. “I- thank you, Santana. That means so much.”

“Anything for one of my girls. Are you done with that?”

Marley nodded and passed it over to Santana to check, you smiled upon finding it empty. “I’m proud of you. And not just because of the juice,” She said, hoping the look she was giving and the squeeze of her hand was enough for her message to get through to Marley. Seemingly, it was, because Marley gave a small smile and nodded again.

“Uhh, Marley,” Puck said, popping his head in the door. “Your mom is here.”

“Okay,” Marley whispered, the fear coming back. God, her mom would be so ashamed of her.

“Stop thinking what you’re thinking,” Santana said in an instant, reading her mind “Your mother loves you and is the team captain of your side.”

Marley hummed, unconvinced, and let Santana pull her up and lead her towards the door. As soon as Marley was in her mom’s reached she was in a bone-crushing hug. Some more tears fell from the both of them, but it was safe, loving and comforting. 

“How is she?” Puck whispered to Santana as they watched the interaction.

Santana shrugged. “She’s better than she was before. She’s terrified, but I think I’ve gotten through to her.”

“Good.”

Millie pulled away and smiled thankfully, knowingly, at Santana, who simply nodded. “Okay you, I ran into the nurse on the way down here and she’s waiting for you in her office, and then we’re going home,” She said.

Marley sighed in relief. “Okay. Can I just say goodbye to Santana first?” She asked.

Sensing that she wanted to say more than goodbye, Millie nodded and started down the hallway with a promise she’d meet her at the nurse’s office. Puck said his goodbye to the three of them, pat Marley on the shoulder and went back to the auditorium, leaving Santana and Marley alone in the hall.

“Thank you so much, Santana, for everything, “ Marley said again, unable to find the words to express how grateful she was for the older girl.

“Like I said,” Santana said softly, “Anything for my girls.”

“Seriously though…”

“Marley, I know. Anything,” Santana cut in.

Marley smiled and moved to take off her jacket, but Santana stopped her. “Leave it on, or you’ll start shivering again. Give it back to me tomorrow,” She said.

“Tomorrow is a Saturday.” She raised her eyebrow.

“I know, I was thinking, if it’s okay with you, that I might stop by tomorrow so we can talk more, because there’s a lot more I have to say, and I figured after all that, we need a day to just hang before I go back to Louisville. Is that alright?” She asked.

Marley nodded. “That’s fine, I’ll tell my mom.”

Santana drew Marley in for a hug and squeezed her tightly, and Marley squeezed her back. “You are so strong, Marley Rose,” Santana promised.

Marley smiled. “Thank you again, Santana.”

Santana laughed quietly. “Anything,” She reminded.

Marley pulled away after a few more moments. “So, I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

“Yeah, text me your address later. And remember, if you need me at all tonight, you’ve got my number.”

Marley nodded and Santana hugged her once more before waving goodbye with a grin, going to join Puck and the others back in the auditorium for awards as Marley started her walk to the nurse’s office, going slow as she still was the tiniest bit dizzy.

Even though she was a long way off from being okay, for the first time in hours, days and even weeks, Marley at least felt like, one day, everything would be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> Marley's storyline deserved better than what it was given. If it was done well, it could have been extremely powerful. Just repeating facts we all already know.


End file.
